When you have super strength...

When you have super strength and try to keep it relatively secret, there are a few issues that arise.

For example: You constantly have to be vigilant about not breaking things, crushing things, and accidentally smashing stuff up. It is more difficult than one would expect. Sometimes in the heat of the moment, coffee tables get busted up, chairs get broken, doors get unhinged, and other unfortunate things occur. Now these little things are even more likely to happen, say when you are drinking with your fellow ΣΑΕ's. You know when the new guy is all up in your grill, and he is just a pledge, and you are an alum. I mean, he should totally get me a beer, and it should be that bottom-of-the-cooler-kind -of-freakin-ice-cold cold, and it should be the kind I like. It should not be some import that is only "cold." I mean it had clearly only come out of the fridge. This stupid pledge didn't even have to put his hand in the ice cold water in the cooler. The little uppity bastard. Look, I also did not want to drink some foreign beer that only comes in bottles and spells "draft" with that stupid "draught" spelling. Gimme some Milwaukee's Beast or a Bud, you know, real beer.

So I was a bit tipsy when pledgie-boy brought me this beer in a non-icy bottle that tasted like drinking a sandwich.

Hey, pledge, Go get me a real beer!

That's a Guinness, it doesn't get more 'real beer' than that.

Did you just question me? Did he just ask me a question about beer? Did this stupid 18-year old just ask me about beer? Listen, kid, I KNOW my beer, and if it ain't American, it ain't beer.

Hey, guys where did you dig this old guy up from?

He's an alum, just be nice to him.

I was being nice, I just gave him one of my Guinness’s, and he's going all ape-shit on me

Hey, stay out of this kid, I just asked him for a real beer.

Dude, he gave you a Guinness. Beer don't get much more real than that.

Listen I don’t want to drink a record book, now get me a beer!

With that I threw the bottle down and it shattered in their living room.

That’s it, buddy! I don’t care if you are an alum, you just broke a bottle in the living room and wasted a perfectly good Guinness.

My Guinness…

It is time for you to go home. Don’t you have a job anyway? It IS Thursday evening for Christ’s sake.

My... my Guinness...

To make a long story short, I tore off their roof and knocked down one of their load-bearing walls. The load bearing wall shouldn’t be too big of a problem since they don’t have a roof.