A worthy rival

So, I was thinking about this "Professor Exasperate" guy. I mean, he's a professor, so he's probably a school nerd, right? That so falls into my area of expertise. Once I catch him, he'll be trapped by my charm like Han Solo in carbonite. But how to catch him?

I decided that what I really needed was a plan to lure him out. Right now, it's hard to tell when something exasperating is a result of one of his nefarious schemes, and when it's just...you know, because people are stupid. I have to admit that I'm not always the greatest at coming up with tricky plans, but I do have resources at my disposal. I know some pretty smart folks. For example, last night I was reading some Harry Potter fan fiction. Those fic writers are clever- they come up with all sorts of ways for Harry to trap You-Know-Who.

Inspired by the HP geeks (and let me tell you, that's a really rapidly growing segment of my fanbase), I realized that people loudly talking at the library is one of the most exasperating things ever, particularly when you are trying to read or study. With this in mind, I headed to the library. The Professor was sure to come by if he thought he could annoy me, right?

Yeah, no luck. I sat there reading for hours. Fortunately, the library has the whole "John Carter of Mars" series by Edgar Rice Burroughs, so I didn't get bored, but seriously? No one spoke out loud all day. Not one cell phone call. Not one obnoxious book club leader. No one yelling at the librarians about unjust late fees. Nothing! Not even, like, a little kid who couldn't read the "Keep Your Voice Down" sign. I mean, I wasted the whole day. The whole day! By the time the library closed, I was really, really....

And that's when I realized I'd fallen into his trap. By not showing up, he'd exasperated me. It's a mistake I won't make again.

Next time, Professor. Next time.